Week 9 has come and gone and here I am, still breathing.
My students are really great so far. I really like the outgoing kids, even the "bad" kids are more fun because at least I know they're engaged somehow. The quiet kids I can't get a read on and thus after those classes you just feel like you slogged through mud. After an outgoing class at least you feel like you got somewhere and there is some life in the room. Overall, I'm liking school and my co-teachers are very kind.
So far, outside of school, its been quite a ride and as I get more independent I realize a lot more how much I am a guest here. I think it is really interesting, because it is probably just me, but in the States, we don't know a foreign person from a native because there are so many different kinds of people, so in essence everyone becomes welcome and yet never are we all part of the family. I get this weird sense that in Korea, every Korean is part of a family. They are all linked by common looks and feelings and attitudes and I am not hooked into that family. I am a guest in it. As a guest I receive cordiality on every side, but I can feel its different. Not that that is a bad thing so much as an observation. I do things so much on my own now, figuring how to ride public transportation, working out bank issues, and mailing packages.
I have to find a way to do all these things on my own and the whole time I get this sense that the "family" is watching--can you do it? Can you survive in our family? Can you survive the right way? It's a special challenge that I have to rise to and meet. This week I did all of those things by myself. I hope the "family" looks on me kindly because I see all that as a sign of growth, however small. Last year I was far too afraid to attempt to do anything of the sort on my own, but now I'm taking life on even more. It doesn't scare me near the same. It just another mountain to climb, a hurdle to jump.
I really like being in Korea. Maybe its the exotic feeling of being somewhere where everything feels foreign. Maybe its the language that I'm still struggling to unravel, but that exotic feeling makes each adventure interesting and fascinating. Sometimes a little frustrating and embarrassing but at the end of the day that's life no matter where you are. Life is struggling to make it through each adventure and striving for more and better, whatever the goal may be.
So far I'm still trying to make friends, but that always requires patience. In the mean time I can feel lonely sometimes. But today I have a small party I'm going to and then later this week I'm going to meet another friend I hope. Then in the weekend I'm going to trek up to Seoul to meet some friends and my former professor. I'm really excited about that trip. Then next weekend I'll go to Jochiwon and see my school! I've really missed my school. And I have an invitation to my Korean friend's house for the holidays at the end of the month. My heart is so relieved about that. I really want to see my friend and her family again. It's going to be an exciting couple of weeks.
My students are really great so far. I really like the outgoing kids, even the "bad" kids are more fun because at least I know they're engaged somehow. The quiet kids I can't get a read on and thus after those classes you just feel like you slogged through mud. After an outgoing class at least you feel like you got somewhere and there is some life in the room. Overall, I'm liking school and my co-teachers are very kind.
So far, outside of school, its been quite a ride and as I get more independent I realize a lot more how much I am a guest here. I think it is really interesting, because it is probably just me, but in the States, we don't know a foreign person from a native because there are so many different kinds of people, so in essence everyone becomes welcome and yet never are we all part of the family. I get this weird sense that in Korea, every Korean is part of a family. They are all linked by common looks and feelings and attitudes and I am not hooked into that family. I am a guest in it. As a guest I receive cordiality on every side, but I can feel its different. Not that that is a bad thing so much as an observation. I do things so much on my own now, figuring how to ride public transportation, working out bank issues, and mailing packages.
I have to find a way to do all these things on my own and the whole time I get this sense that the "family" is watching--can you do it? Can you survive in our family? Can you survive the right way? It's a special challenge that I have to rise to and meet. This week I did all of those things by myself. I hope the "family" looks on me kindly because I see all that as a sign of growth, however small. Last year I was far too afraid to attempt to do anything of the sort on my own, but now I'm taking life on even more. It doesn't scare me near the same. It just another mountain to climb, a hurdle to jump.
I really like being in Korea. Maybe its the exotic feeling of being somewhere where everything feels foreign. Maybe its the language that I'm still struggling to unravel, but that exotic feeling makes each adventure interesting and fascinating. Sometimes a little frustrating and embarrassing but at the end of the day that's life no matter where you are. Life is struggling to make it through each adventure and striving for more and better, whatever the goal may be.
So far I'm still trying to make friends, but that always requires patience. In the mean time I can feel lonely sometimes. But today I have a small party I'm going to and then later this week I'm going to meet another friend I hope. Then in the weekend I'm going to trek up to Seoul to meet some friends and my former professor. I'm really excited about that trip. Then next weekend I'll go to Jochiwon and see my school! I've really missed my school. And I have an invitation to my Korean friend's house for the holidays at the end of the month. My heart is so relieved about that. I really want to see my friend and her family again. It's going to be an exciting couple of weeks.
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